chamakate chaaNd ko TuuTaa huaa taaraa banaa Daalaa

chamakate chaaNd ko TuuTaa huaa taaraa banaa Daalaa
merii aawaragi ne mujhako, awaara banaa Daalaa

yahi aaGaaz thaa meraa, yahi anjaam honaa tha
mujhe barabaad hona tha, mujhe naakaam hona tha
meri taqadir ne mujhako, taqadir ka mara bana Dala
chamakate chaaNd ko …

baDaa dilkash baDaa raNgiin hai yah shahar kahate hain
yahaaN par hain hazaaron ghar gharon mein log rahate hain
mujhe is shahar ki galiyon kaa banjaaraa banaa Daalaa
chamakate chaaNd ko …

A Blonde’s Dream

One day a blonde kept having the same weird dream everyday, so she went to her doctor.

Doctor: What was your dream about?
Blonde: I was being chase by a vampire!

Doctor: (giggles quitely) So… what is the scenery like?
Blonde: I was running in a hall way.

Doctor: Then what happened?
Blonde: Well that’s the weird thing. In every single dream, the same thing happened. I always come to this door, but I can’t open it. I keep pushing the door and pushing the door, but it wouldn’t budge!

Doctor: Does the door have any letters on it?
Blonde: Yes it did.

Doctor: And what did these letter spell?
Blonde: It said “Pull”

Muddaton Baad

muddatoN baad vo soorat jo dikhaaee dee hai
dil kee dhaDkan mujhe aaNkhoN se sunaaee dee hai

shaam se jaag rahee haiN vo nidaasee aaNkheN
Doobte chaaNd ne khiDkee se baDHaaee dee hai

us janam meiN bhee mulaaqaat kee ummeed naheeN
is janam ne to janam bhar kee judaaee dee hai

hamne pehle bhee ye KHwaaboN ka safar dekha hai
dhoop itnee thee ke sehra ne duhaaee dee hai

Half Sister

One Sunday morning George burst into the living room and said, “Dad! Mom! I have some great news for you! I am getting married to the most beautiful girl in town. She lives a block away and her name is Susan. After dinner, George’s dad took him aside, “Son, I have to talk with you.” “Look at your mother, George. She and I have been married 30 years, she’s a wonderful wife and mother, but, she has never offered much excitement in the bedroom, so I used to fool around with women a lot. Susan is actually your half sister, and I’m afraid you can’t marry her.”

George was broken-hearted. After eight months he eventually started dating girls again. A year later he came home and very proudly announced, “Dianne said yes! We’re getting married in June.” Again his father insisted on another private conversation and broke the sad news. “Dianne is your half sister too, George. I’m awfully sorry about this.” George was livid!

He finally decided to go to his mother with the news his father had shared. “Dad has done so much harm. I guess I’m never going to get married,” he complained. “Every time I fall in love, dad tells me the girl is my half sister.” “Hehehe,” his mother chuckled, shaking her head, “don’t pay any attention to what he says. He’s not really your father.”

Ashes to Ashes

Three gay men died, and were going to be cremated. Their lovers happened to be at the funeral home at the same time, and were discussing what they planned to do with the ashes.

The first man said, “My Ryan loved to fly, so I’m going up in a plane and scatter his ashes in the sky.”

The second man said, “My Ross was a good fisherman, so I’m going to scatter his ashes in our favorite lake.”

The third man said, “My Jack was such a good lover, I think I’m going to dump his ashes in a pot of chili, so he can tear my ass up just one more time.”

Garden of Hedon

As he drove along the highway, a guy kept seeing billboards with beautiful, tanned people and the words: Visit the Garden of Hedon. His curiosity got the best of him and he turned off the road at the entrance to the place a few miles down the road. He went inside a building marked “Registration” and saw an attractive woman sitting at a desk.

“Exactly what do you do here?” he asked.

“It’s quite simple,” said the receptionist. “This is a nudist camp. We take off all our clothes and commune with nature.”

“Cool,” said the guy, “count me in!” So he paid his membership fee, took off his gear and strolled off. As he walked along a path, he saw a big sign which read, “Beware of Gays.” A little further along he saw another sign which read the same thing: “Beware of Gays.”

He continued walking until he came to a small clearing which had a bronze plaque set in the ground. He bent over to read the plaque and it said, “Sorry, you’ve had two warnings!”

Blind Skydiving

Bill, an experienced sky diver, was getting ready for a jump one day when he spotted another man outfitted to dive wearing dark glasses, carrying a white can and holding a seeing-eye dog by a leash. Shocked that the blind man was also going to jump, Bill struck up a conversation, expressing his admiration for the man’s courage. Then, curious, he asked, “How do you know when the ground is getting close?”

“Easy,” replied the blind man. “The leash goes slack.”

DNA Good News and Bad News

“I have good news and bad news,” a defense attorney told his client.
“First the bad news: The blood test came back, and your DNA is an exact match with the sample found on the victim’s dress.”

“Oh, no – I’m ruined!” cried the client. “What’s the good news?”

“Your cholesterol is down to 140!”

Kab Tak Yoon Heen

kab tak yuNhee rulaayeNgee tanhaaiyaaN hameiN
na milegee kya kabhee teree parchaaiyaaN hameiN

shaayad wafa ke phool khileNge bahaar meiN
sadiyaaN guzar gayee haiN isee intezaar meiN
taDapa rahee hai dard kee shehanaaiyaaN hameiN

ham kho gaye to phir na mileNge kabhee tujhe
dar-dar phiraayegee teree deevaangee tujhe
DHooNDeNgee teree rooH kee geheraaiyaaN hameiN

First Hot Dog

Two scottish nuns have just arrived in the USA by boat and one says to the other, “I hear that the occupants of this country actually eat dogs.”

“Odd,” her companion replies, “but if we shall live in America, we might as well do as the Americans do.”

Nodding emphatically, the mother superior points to a hot dog vendor and they both walk toward him. “Two dogs, please,” says one. The vendor is only too pleased to oblige and he wraps both hot dogs in foil. Excited, the nuns hurry over to a bench and begin to unwrap their “dogs.”

The mother superior is first to open hers. Staring at it for a moment, she leans over to the other nun and whispers cautiously, “What part did you get?”